Photo Friday: the Tweenager Edition

This is Hope's room.  Yes, I'm letting her wallpaper her wall with teenyboppers. It looks kinda creepy like something from One Hour Photo:

B*tches in Bookshops

Truth in Fiction: The Murder of Roger Ackroyd and The Poisoner's Handbook

I've always loved Agatha Christie mysteries.  When I was a little younger than Hope (about 10 or 11) I read aloud to the elderly lady next door.  Mrs. Jenkins was nuts about mysteries and especially Agatha Christie novels.  I cannot remember which ones we read, but I know that it gave me my first love of the thrill for the whodunnit.  After that I started to blow through as many Christie novels as I could and then I found that they started to lose appeal.  You see, I began to guess the murderer.  I would pick out the least likely person and I knew that 90% of the time that was the killer.  Now I know that to truly experience the thrill of Christie, I need to limit her and only read one book a year by this queen of mystery. 

The Murder of Roger Ackroyd was my Christie choice for this year as it is one I hadn't read before and is considered one of her finest.  I can honestly say that I did not guess the killer until the last 30 pages of the book.  I was shocked and surprised.  I can't say anything more about the novel for fear of spoiling it, but I do think it is one of her best and every one should wait for a rainy day, grab a cup of tea, and read it in one sitting.

Although poison makes an appearance in The Murder of Roger Ackroyd, it isn't the star (that's the most I can say without giving the plot away).  So why did I chose Deborah Blum's The Poisoner's Handbook: Murder and the Birth of Forensic Medicine in Jazz Age New York?   For one, I really wanted to read this book.  Secondly, time period wise it occurs about the same period of time.  Ackroyd was published in 1926 and the Jazz Age occurred in the 1920s.  But thirdly and most of all I wanted to read the two books in conjunction because of this quote, taken from Blum's epilogue to Poisoner's:

 "...[I]n reality, I find poison killing among the most disturbing of all homicides.... They're closer to that lurking monster in the closet than some drug-impaired crazy with a gun." 

 Blum recognizes that most poisoning cases are frightening because the murderer has planned to kill someone familiar and poison is the perfect way to go undetected.  Although Blum's book does detail some instances of poisoning from unsafe working conditions, accidental deaths, unregulated products, and a rogue killer; most of the cases involve someone poisoning their spouse, family, friends, children, etc.... I think that this is what links the book to Christie; her murderers live among the victims.  In other words, someone at the dinner table is a murderer and that in itself is horrifying.

While The Murder of Roger Ackroyd was entertaining and page-turning, I don't think I can say enough positives about Poisoner's Handbook.  The book details the science behind poison and forensics, but it also offers a fascinating history of Charles Norris (medical examiner) and Alexander Gettler (toxicologist) and how the two men increased the accuracy of forensic science by repeated experiments and scholarly research, established procedures and a place of professionalism, and cleaned out corruption within the office.  I also learned a great deal about the formation of the FDA, Prohibition, criminal organizations, and the dangerous life of Jazz Age New York (I never thought of what it would be like in NY with everyone driving and no standard driver's license or driving laws... ack!).

Blum really brought the science of toxicology to life; almost too much.  At one point I was reading about an autopsy and there was a discussion of various tools used to saw into parts and I literally had tunnel vision.  I thought I was going to black out!  I was disgusted by what my imagination did to the description and at the same time in awe of the powerful writing.

History, mystery, true crime, and science fans thoroughly enjoy The Poisoner's Handbook and mystery fans are sure to be stumped -- at least for a bit -- by The Murder of Roger Ackroyd.

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The Murder of Roger Ackroyd was read for the Truth in Fiction challenge and Vintage Mystery Reading Challenge.

The Poisoner's Handbook: Murder and the Birth of Forensic Medicine in Jazz Age New York was read for the Truth in Fiction challenge and the Support your Local Library Challenge

I Like to Move it, Move it....

... as in I like to exercise.

Let me say that again.... I LIKE TO EXERCISE.

I didn't realize that I have a new found fondness for being sore and sweaty until last week.  I managed 2 or 3 quick 20 minute walks, but I couldn't do any exercising.  Atticus was so sick all week and my time was spent cuddling my little man and reading Brown Bear, Brown Bear 10 million times.  While I enjoyed my extra snuggles, I was not a fan of the no sleeping and being cooped up in the house.  I was anxious, had trouble sleeping when I did get a chance to snooze and I had an overwhelming sense of moving as if I was in a vat of molasses.  Until I went for a walk.  I walked fast and soon found my pep back.

This has made me realize how important exercise is to my health.  Yes, it helps with weight loss, but it does so much more.  Here are some reasons why I'm digging the exercise and then I'll fill you in on my exercise routine:

1. I sleep better at night
2. I can eat more calories 
3. I can redeem my food screw-ups; instead of being bummed I blew my calories I can do damage control by exercising.
4. It is a really neat feeling to feel muscles underneath all the squishy.  One day there will be less squishy and more muscle.
5. I'm energetic
6. I want more water and therefore drink more water.

I've gotten myself down to a pretty good routine in two weekly cycles:

Cycle #1:

• Monday:  30 Day Shred / 20 minute walk
• Tuesday:  Belly Dance Slim Down
• Wednesday:  30 Day Shred / 20 minute walk
• Thursday:  Belly Dance Slim Down
• Friday: 30 Day Shred / 20 minute walk 

Cycle #2: 

• Monday: Belly Dance Slim Down
• Tuesday: 30 Day Shred / 20 minute walk
• Wednesday:  Belly Dance Arms and Abs and Belly Dance Hips, Buns, Thighs 
• Thursday: 30 Day Shred / 20 minute walk
• Friday:  Belly Dance Slim Down

I don't do "typical" exercise on the weekend.  I play in the yard with the kids, clean the house, go for walks, and garden. My weekends are typically filled with family and we try being as active as possible with the kiddos.

So far this is working for me and I'll probably keep this routine through April.  In May I'm looking at changing to Jillian Michaels Ripped in 30, doing different cardio, and learning how to roller skate (I was never good at it as a child).

Let me know if you have any exercising favorites and I'll try to check them out!

Making Monday, #2

A glance at what I'm working on and what I've done...

Bean Burgers and Summer Squash:

Granny Square Pillow cushions:

Peas are sprouting in the garden!

Blueberry Orange Muffins:

Truth in Fiction: Charles Dickens and Our Mutual Friend

This is my first post for my reading challenge that I am hosting (I'm a horrible challenge host) that seeks to pair non-fiction books with novels.  I read Our Mutual Friend by Charles Dickens in January and I read Claire Tomalin's Dickens biography in February.  Here it is mid-March and I'm finally writing.  Naughty blogger.

I've hesitated on writing because I was trying to figure out what "angle" I wanted to take.  I don't want to recite the life of Charles Dickens and I've already written a review of Our Mutual Friend.  I've decided to not rehash things and instead to talk about where these two books intersect.  First, let me warn you that there will be Our Mutual Friend spoilers galore and so don't read on if you have yet to read the novel.

Our Mutual Friend is Charles Dickens last completed novel before his death in 1870.  Published in a serialized format from 1864-1865, the novel concerns a mysterious death, a will, and -- a favorite topic to Dickens -- money.  This is the novel Dickens had with him when he was involved in the Staplehurst rail crash.  Dickens grabbed his manuscript and managed to help get other passengers to safety.  At the time he was traveling with his mistress Ellen Ternan.  Dickens had been involved in come capacity with Ellen Ternan for some time and he left his wife and mother of his brood of children to be with the young actress Ellen, called Nelly.

It is beyond a doubt that Dickens is a very fine writer and has great compassion for the poor and downtrodden; however, he is human and flawed and his abominable behavior towards his wife was the one glaring lapse of character (of course he had other flaws, but this is the most "public" of his faults).  In reading Tomalin's biography it is interesting to note that Dickens tries very hard to cover-up his faults and to almost talk himself into being faultless.  He assumes a victim like stance rushing towards separation, asking his children to abandon their mother, even taking the younger children from their mother, forcing Catherine Dickens to pretend that all was well and even make social calls to the Ternans.  All the while he raising money for orphans and working to establish and keep up his home for fallen women.  In addition he is doing public readings and writing... still the beloved Boz.

What links Our Mutual Friend to this duplicitous time in his life is the one glaring issues I had with Our Mutual Friend -- the manipulation and lies fed to Bella Wilfer and how it is TOTALLY okay and even joyous in the end.  In my review of Our Mutual Friend I discuss how Bella is duped into thinking that she is marrying John Rokesmith who in fact is John Harmon.  A condition of Harmon's inheritance is that he marry Bella Wilfour. Well, Harmon is thought dead, Bella is released from her engagement to a man she doesn't know, and the Boffins (common and good people) inherit the money.  The Boffins take on Bella as a ward and shower her with affections and gifts.  Enter John Rokesmith (aka Harmon) who is secretary to Mr. Boffin.  Bella and John fall in love; John is kicked out of the home, Bella follows him, they wed, time passes, she has a baby and then one day.  BAM!  John tells Bella who he really is after a ridiculous scene where we learn that the Boffins were "in on it" and knew that Bella was being tested.  John wanted to know that Bella just wasn't after the money and so there was a long period of time where Bella was actively deceived to test her worth.  Most surprising is Bella's reaction.  She isn't angry.  She doesn't question.  She accepts that she needs to put full faith in her husband and trust that all of his lies and deceptions were for her own good.

At the end everyone is happy and smiling and all is right.  And it smacks of falsity.  I think this is pushing it even by Victorian standards of wifely obedience.

So while Dickens is in the midst of trying to be the lovable, fatherly Boz and writing about societal ills and supporting through philanthropy those wronged by selfishness he is engaged in breaking up his home and his wife's heart and carrying on with a much younger actress.  I can't help but think, and this may be a stretch, that Dickens knew he was wrong and sought at every chance to validate his own willingness to deceive with his sense of morality.  This sort of cognitive dissonance is apparent in Bella's thankful attitude towards John and the Boffins deceiving and testing her character through their falseness. 

Once again, I don't have any evidence that this was really on Dickens's mind or that he truly struggled with his poor choices.  I like to think that he knew he was wrong and was seeking a way to make his errors seem not so bad, but I don't know that for sure.  It could just all be a coincidence, but it is interesting to ponder.

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Our Mutual Friend was read for January Charles Dickens month, the Truth in Fiction challenge, Classics Challenge 2012, Victorian Challenge 2012, Tea and Books challenge,  and The TBR Pile Challenge.

Charles Dickens: A Life was read for January Charles Dickens month and the Truth in Fiction challenge

First Weight Loss Goal Reached!

On Friday, March 9th, I reached my first weight loss goal.  280.  That's 16 pounds lost.  I've actually lost another pound since then, but I wanted to mark this occasion. 

This is a really horrible first goal picture.  The mirror is dirty and I'm in Hope's room which was (is) a huge mess.  I don't even know if you can tell a difference.  I know most people say "your face is thinner" and I can certainly see a difference there. The first photo is from Atticus's birthday party in October of 2012 and was the only picture I could find where I wasn't hiding behind someone.  

Since I reached my first goal I'll be treating myself to a pedicure as soon as the tattoo on my leg is healed.  That was my "prize" to myself.  I'm really looking forward to it. 

I'm still in the weight-loss competition at work.  The competition was supposed to be over on the 9th, but it has been extended to April 5th.  The prize is $440.  All 22 contestants paid $10 a piece and the University matches that up to $250.  I want to win so badly.  If I win Sam and I are using the money to go on a mini-trip for my birthday in late April.

I kinda have a nice little mini-goal/reward system going.  It is intimidating to know that one has 146lbs to lose (well, 130 now) and breaking it up helps.  Here are my current mini-goals:

• April 5th -- 275, end of contest
• April 27th -- 270, my birthday
• May 19th -- 265, my brothers wedding
• June 1st -- 260, bring up the clothes stored in the basement and have a 1/2 spa day!

These nice little 20 pound chunks are less scary.

Also, the Non Scale Victories are rolling in.  I know my face looks thinner, but I (and Sam) can tell that my body is changing:

• I can do all the jumping jacks on Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred without stopping.
• I can do 15 pushups (I couldn't even do one when I started)
• My clothes are falling off (Sam said he doesn't mind this, snicker snicker).  My underwear was slipping off and down in my jeans yesterday.  And on Sunday Atticus pulled my pants clean off while I was doing dishes.  He tugged on my pj pants with one hand and the pants went to my ankles.  Atticus thought it was hilarious.  Thankfully Sam was in the shower and Hope was at a friends house and we didn't have guests! 
• My size 26/28 pants are hilariously big and my size 24 capris are fitting loosely (I busted a zipper on pair last summer because they were so tight).

Soon it will be time to head to the thrift stores for some summer clothes!

Making Monday

I need to embrace the fact that I'm really horrible with remembering to take enough pictures for my blog posts.  You'll have to content yourselves with a poor phone photo of a finished dishcloth sans the dreaded "weaving in the ends". 

It is a little wonky on that >>> side, but whatevs.  There are many more things in the works: 

• Our raised bed has been built and filled with good soil.  Which by the way, wheeling a wonky wheelbarrow filled with dirt down a steep hill is an AWESOME workout for the triceps and thighs. 
• Peas, carrots, onions, spinach and lettuce are in the ground!  Sweet potatoes will go in next week.
• Thyme is planted next to the oregano and rosemary in the front yard.
• I'm crocheting throw pillow covers for our sofa.  Hope to finish the first by the end of the week (I'm forever the optimist).
• Speaking of yarn, Michael's was having a sale and I bought 10 skeins of cotton yarn for dishcloths.  I usually keep some cotton and needles in my bag for work meetings and such.  It is easy to transport and pick up and keeps me from getting restless in long meetings.  I keep a stash on hand for gift baskets for teachers and family members.  I need to whip-up a stack of receiving blankets or bibs or hats because so many people I know are having bebes.  
• I'm still working on the same blasted embroidery piece.  I don't think I'll ever finish it.  GROAN.  When and if I do finish it will rock.

Next update I swear I'll have more pictures.... if I remember.

The Sunday Salon: Classics Club

Okay, I've tried very hard to not sign-up for any new challenges until May and when I have a few completed (which reminds me I need to see where I'm at with my challenges).  BUT this isn't a year long challenge; this is a  five year challenge to read 50+ classics.  Of course we have the her bookishness Jillian to thank for this inspiring idea and pulling it all together.  I've picked 100 books to complete in the next five years (01 March 2012 - 01 March 2017).  You may notice that there are more than 100 books (technically) listed.  All of the novels composing The Forsyte Saga (9) and Kristen Lavransdatter (3) are not individually listed.  This will give me some wiggle room in case there are books I don't care to finish.  I have "shorter works" on my list, but I've chosen to read the entire short story collection to make it count.  I do have one play, Richard III, that is the shortest work on the list. 

I also set a few rules for myself:  1) all the books had to be published prior to 1950 and 2) I can reread, but only if I've read the book once or it has been over 5 years since I read the book).  So, alas, I cannot reread Jane Eyre and Wuthering Heights over over over and over again. But the good news is that I will hopefully increase my list of classics I adore.

On to the list!  Turquoise books are rereads and Greens are Viragos!

1. The Tenant of Wildfell Hall by Anne Bronte (completed 04/17/12)
2. The Leavenworth Case by Anna Katherine Green
3. The Dead Secret by Wilkie Collins
4. This Side of Paradise by F. Scott Fitzgerald
5. Uncle Silas by Sheridan Le Fanu (completed 07/29/12)
6. The Warden by Anthony Trollope
7. Barchester Towers by Anthony Trollope
8. Doctor Thorne by  Anthony Trollope
9. Framley Parsonage by Anthony Trollope
10. Small House at Allington by  Anthony Trollope
11. Last Chronicle of Barset by  Anthony Trollope
12. Far from the Madding Crowd by Thomas Hardy
13. Kristen Lavransdatter (all three books) by Sigrid Undset
14. Hunger by Knut Hamsen
15. No Name by Wilkie Collins
16. Memoirs of Sherlock Holmes by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
17. The Last September by Elizabeth Bowen
18. Gothic Tales by Elizabeth Gaskell
19. Orlando by Virginia Woolf
20. Adam's Breed by Radclyffe Hall
21. The Painted Veil by W. Somerset Maugham
22. The Collected Stories of Elizabeth Bowen (completed 07/01/12)
23. Howard's End by E. M. Forster 
24. The Golden Apples by Eudora Welty
25. The Blue Fairy Book by Andrew Lang
26. Pickwick Papers by Charles Dickens 
27. Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens 
28. Nicholas Nickleby by Charles Dickens 
29. Old Curiosity Shop by Charles Dickens 
30. Barnaby Rudge by Charles Dickens 
31. Martin Chuzzlewit by Charles Dickens 
32. Dombey and Son by Charles Dickens 
33. David Copperfield by Charles Dickens 
34. Bleak House by Charles Dickens 
35. Hard Times by Charles Dickens 
36. Little Dorrit by Charles Dickens 
37. A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens 
38. Great Expectations by Charles Dickens 
39. Our Mutual Friend by Charles Dickens 
40. Mystery of Edwin Drood by Charles Dickens 
41. The Monk by Matthew Lewis
42. Frankenstein by Mary Shelley
43. Richard III by William Shakespeare
44. The Woman in White by Wilkie Collins
45. Middlemarch by George Eliot
46. Jude the Obscure by Thomas Hardy
47. Portrait of a Lady by Henry James
48. Vanity Fair by William Makepeace Thackery
49. The Invisible Man by H.G. Wells
50. The Custom of the Country by Edith Wharton
51. The Heat of the Day by Elizabeth Bowen
52. Sister Carrie by Theodore Dreiser
53. The Forsyte Saga (all 9 books plus the "interludes")
54. The Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce
55. Mrs. Dalloway by Virginia Woolf
56. The Way We Live Now by Anthony Trollope
57. Diana of the Crossways by George Meredith
58. No Signposts in the Sea by Vita Sackville-West
59. The Friendly Young Ladies by Mary Renault
60. Hunt the Slipper by Violet Trefusis
61. Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen
62. The Italian by Ann Radcliffe
63. Lorna Doone by Richard Blackmore
64. Daniel Deronda by George Eliot
65. Sentimental Education by Gustave Flaubert
66. Tess of the D'Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy
67. The Wings of the Dove by Henry James
68. He Knew He Was Right by Anthony Trollope
69. East Lynne by Ellen Wood
70. The House in Paris by Elizabeth Bowen
71. The Professor by Charlotte Bronte
72. The Oxford Book of Victorian Ghost Stories
73. The Rising Tide by Molly Keane
74. Without my Cloak by Kate O'Brien
75. Harriet Hume by Rebecca West
76. Persuasion by Jane Austen
77. Melmoth the Wanderer by Charles Maturin
78. Trilby by George Du Maurier
79. Madame Bovary by Gustave Flaubert
80. The House of the Seven Gables by Nathaniel Hawthorne
81. Passage to India by E M Forster
82. For Whom the Bell Tolls by Ernest Hemingway
83. The Thing on the Doorstep and Other Weird Tales by H P Lovecraft
84. The Call of Cthlulu and Other Weird Tales by H P Lovecraft
85. The Thinking Reed by Rebecca West
86. Wives and Daughters by Elizabeth Gaskell
87. The Three Sisters by May Sinclair
88. Shirley by Charlotte Bronte
89. Cranford by Elizabeth Gaskell
90. War and Peace by Leo Tolstory
91. War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells
92. A House and Its Head by Ivy Compton-Burnett
93. The Collected Shorter Fiction of Virginia Woolf
94. Summer will Show by Sylvia Townsend Warner
95. The Judge by Rebecca West
96. The Return of the Native by Thomas Hardy (completed 12/31/12)
97. Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy
98. All Passion Spent by Vita Sackville West
99. A Handful of Dust by Evelyn Waugh
100. Brideshead Revisited by Evelyn Waugh

I've thought long and hard about my list.  Over three quarters of the novels are books I own.  I'm also incorporating my desire to read all of Dickens's novels in order, complete a Trollope series, and read a stack of Viragos.  My approach is that challenge success is based on making challenges work together.

Okay -- mini-rewards.  For every 5 books off of this list I read I will purchase one classic novel NOT ON THIS LIST in a nice copy.  By nice copy I mean that it isn't a ratty paperback in a thrift store bin -- it could be a vintage something in good condition, a Penguin clothbound, a newish edition with a lovely introduction.  See, I'm already prepping for 2017 onward!  At the end of my 100 books read I will have 20 new-to-me classic novels that are lovely, pristine, and will beautify my shelves, my mind, and my imagination.

I hope you'll join us in the Classics Club!  I think this will be an amazing experience.

Thirteen Things I'd Like to Accomplish Before the Weekend is Up

1. Plan out and whip-up interesting lunches and quick dinners.  I'm moving my grocery shopping day from Sunday to Saturday and spending Saturday afternoon prepping/cooking/freezing a few meals for the week.  It is too rough coming home from work, exercising, and then rushing to cook.
2. Get some of my plants in the garden if it isn't too rainy.  We're planning on planting spinach, lettuce, carrots, onions, and sweet potatoes.
3. Convince Atticus that big boy bathes in the bath tub are fun and not a form of torture.
4. Finish The Poisoner's Bible and take it back to the public library.  
5. Attempt to have Hope squeeze me into her busy social calendar.
6. Write a long letter to a dear friend in Colorado and put a something special in the mail to a Georgia friend.
7. Talk my future sister-in-law into letting me throw her a Batman themed wedding shower.
8. Speaking of Batman, I need to rent the new Justice League movie to watch with Sam (<<<< good wife points!).
9. Stitch. Stitch. Stitch. Stitch. Stitch.
10. Shave my legs; which is a pain because I have to shave AROUND the healing leg tattoo.
11. Make a half-assed attempt to clean my house.
12. Brew up some chai and read some Tenant of Wildfell Hall.
13. Let Jillian Michaels kick my ass even more. 

Readerly Rambles: 03/14/2012

What I've Read:
I finished out my February reading by completing Claire Tomalin's Charles Dickens: A Life and Agatha Christie's The Murder of Roger Ackroyd.  Both books were fantastic and it was an excellent close to the month.  I still need to write up my Truth in Fiction challenge review of Tomalin's biography and Our Mutual Friend.  I keep forgetting.  I'm such an awful challenge host.  (pencils in reminder)

What I'm Reading:
I'm nearly done with Deborah Blum's book about the beginnings of forensic science The Poisoner's Bible: Murder and the Birth of Forensic Science in Jazz Age New York.  I cannot believe that a book can be scientific (chemical properties and lab explanations), give an excellent historical/social/political background, detail famous and not so famous murders, and be such a fast read.  I've learned so much -- and not just about poisons, autopsies, prohibition, and such -- but I've learned a bit about what actually went into discovering all these humdinger tests.  I will tell you that this is the first book that made me nearly pass out.  There was a discussion of autopsies, various tools used to saw things, and some horrific internal damage due to poison.  For some reason my brain tried to imagine sound and smell and I had tunnel vision.  Yup.  I'm certainly not seeking a career change at this point in time.

I'm also re-reading Anne Bronte's The Tenant of Wildfell Hall.  I read this in high school because my teacher was frustrated that I'd already read Wuthering Heights and Jane Eyre.  She assigned me this Bronte novel.  I remember loving it, but I'm finding it much more complex and rewarding this time around.  Probably because I'm not an idiot high school student.

What's Up Next:
Hopefully by the end of this week I'll finish up my two current reads and crack open The Bronte Myth by Lucasta Miller and The Leavenworth Case by Anna Katherine Green.

Upcoming Adventures in Book Nerding:
 I have a few nerdy projects in the works.  I'm about to do a great big clean-up of my LibraryThing account.  Now that my shelves are all prettified I can attack LibraryThing.  I have updated additions and deletions in ages.

In addition I've started assembling my list of 100 classics for The Classics Club!  I'm super-excited about this so expect a post in the near future. 

I think this is what Rebecca West* was talking about....

  "I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is: I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat."  Rebecca West


I was all set to write a post about something literary while I sit here at the coffee shop.  I had done a bit of reading and just pulled out my laptop.  I had a quick conversation with a coffee shop employee about laundry -- of all things -- and was then lamenting that someone had stolen an owl decoration from the coffee shop. Coffee shop employee #1 was 8 feet in  front of me and employee #2 was about 3 feet in front of me.

Then Mr. Man (and his silent friend, Mr. Man #2), sitting across from me interrupted the conversation and you have pissed me off to no end. 

Mr. Man:  "Hey, why don't you two sit near each other?!" (Mr. Man #2 laughs)

Me and Employee #1 look quizzically at each other

Mr. Man:  "Instead of yelling across the store at each other you should sit together... your voice carries... we are trying to have a conversation! Please be quiet"

Me:  (angry eyes)

I muttered a "fuck you", shut my mouth and turned to my computer.  He asked with such vehemence and disdain that you would have thought I had been shouting for an hour.  Granted, my voice does carry and I probably was speaking loud, but the conversation was less than 5 minutes long.  And if he had asked nicely I would have apologized and lowered my voice. 

I sat for a good 10 minutes fuming.  Why was I so angry?

I felt like a scolded little girl.  That's the problem.  He's a man and he demanded something rudely.  I have had problems with people being loud in the coffee shop before and asked them to be quiet.  Granted I usually gave it longer and it is usually a large group of teenagers being unruly.  I've also asked people to lower their voices when I'm out with the kids and they are swearing or talking loudly about sex.  So basically I apply reason to the situation.

Of course, I'm a woman.  I've been conditioned to ask for things nicely.  I've been trained to feel like I'm doing something bad by making my wishes known.  This is how I typically ask for someone to be quiet:

"Excuse me, I'm so sorry to interrupt and I don't want to complain, but could you please lower your voice.  I hate to be a nuisance but my friend and I are having trouble hearing each other.  Thank you so much."

 I walk up to the person and I don't bark from my chair.  I have a smile on my face and I'm genuine when I thank them.  Of course, if it is a mom with kids or a large group of people having a gathering of some sort I usually just move.  I may be annoyed, but I don't want to intrude on a group with a planned event and mamas can only do so much with kiddos.

This man barked at me from his chair.  He shouted his request.  He piled on sarcasm and disdain and then added a perfunctory please.  What I hate most about him is he thinks he is  better than me.  He had someone bring him his coffee, he counted out exact change and didn't even go to the register, he is in the coffee shop regularly and he radiates smug superiority.   He stared me down like someone who is used to being obeyed.   He looked down on me.  It may be my tattoos.  It may be my age.  It may because I'm a woman.  Whatever it is, I am beneath him in some way.  (EDIT: JUST CONFIRMED ... IT IS BECAUSE I HAVE A VAGINA. IT IS OKAY FOR LOUD MALE VOICES.  HE HAS NO ISSUE WITH THAT AS EVIDENCED BY STRONG MALE VOICED UNCHECKED BY MR. MAN). 

Well, fuck you buddy.  I turned in my chair.  Interrupted his conversation:

Me:  "Excuse me... I said EXCUSE ME"

Mr. Man and Mr. Man #2:  (turn and stare)

Me:  "Next time you need to ask someone something you should say it nicely.  I'm very angry about how you spoke to me."

Mr. Man:  "I said 'please' what more do you want?"  (Mr. Man #2 is laughing)

Me:  "You were sarcastic, patronizing, and condescending to start with... just saying please isn't enough.  I wouldn't have minded if you had asked nicely, I would have been most apologetic."

Mr. Man:  "Sorry, is that better?"

Then we stared at each other steadily for a good minute and I turned back around. I thought of MANY other things to say, but I knew it wouldn't do any good and I would end up losing my temper. 

Did I make the situation better? NO.  Will he change his way?  NO.  Do I feel better because I didn't let a high-class asshole Mr. Man speak to me like I was a wayward little girl?  Abso-fucking-lutely. 

I'm still angry.  They are still sitting right across from me.  I found a good solution for dissipating anger -- I picture Mr. Man and Mr. Man #2 as part of Rick Santorum's personal fluffer team. 

Bookshelf Organization For the Win!

I've been thinking a great deal about what kind of reader I am and how to manage my desire to procure as many books possible and READ THEM ALL!  Earlier in the year I developed my own collection development policy; this has helped with helping me decide what to purchase, check-out from the library, and even what reading challenges to complete.  I consult it before every book buying  or library adventure.

But how to organize my growing collection to something manageable?  I think I hit on the perfect solution for me, but first let me explain my previous shelf-organizing schemes.

• In college (1999-2004):  I separated fiction and non-fiction and within those sections I separated alphabetically by author paperback and hardcover.  A smaller shelf in my bedroom housed textbooks, tons of library books, and my semester's assigned novels and collections, and my TBR.  PROS -- everything fit in my teeny apartment and I was able to successfully keep up with course reads and gobs of library materials.  CONS -- I hated dividing paperback and hardback.  I don't know why I did it.  I think it had to do with balancing my shelves; but I really hated splitting authors.
•  Post-college (2005-2007):  I organized by Library of Congress.  This was painstaking.  Let me preface this by saying I ADORE LC and think it superior to Dewey in organization, scope, and room for growth.  However, looking up each call number, making a teeny label, and then shelving was ridiculous.  In my defense, I had just started my library job as a copy cataloger and I had a hard-on for WorldCat.  Library books and my TBR pile were in separate stacks on the floor by my bed.  PROS -- it was so effing organized.  CONS -- it took FOREVER to begin and even longer to maintain.
• Recent (2008 - 2012):  Fiction is alphabetical by author.  Then non-fiction is loosely organized in LC order.  I pulled out my Viragos, NYRBS, and Persephones and they are organized separately.  Library books and current reads were piled wherever.  PROS -- Organized and easy to shelve.  CONS -- Not quite organized and, frankly, boring.

What I really wanted was a combination between the post-college and most recent modes of organization.  I remember thinking that a book organization analysis was needed when I was trying to pull books by Victorians.  I wanted some subject/period/author organization offered by LC, but I needed it to simple.  I didn't want to organize by genres because I knew I would need to divide authors.... after all, A Tale of Two Cities is historical fiction, but I didn't want my Dickens separated.  And what about someone like Mary Stewart?  Some of her books are historical and some are straight-up Gothy romantic thrillers.

I finally hit on an idea:  I divided most of my fiction in 50-year chunks and organized by author birthdays.  Within the categories I alphabetized by author.  Here were my categories:

• Pre-1800
• 1800- 1850
• 1851-1900
• 1901-1950
• 1951-present
• Anthologies, short fiction and poetry
• NYRBS, Persephones, and Viragos
• Non-Fiction
• Library books
• To Be Read pile

Now, an in progress picture:

As Sam said "that is a shit ton of books!"

I don't think I need to tell you that this took me all morning.  But, hey, the shelves had a through dusting!

Okay, here is the pre-1800to 1950 shelf.  Click to embiggen.

Here we have NYRBs, Persephones, and Virago books. Then anthologies, fiction 1951 to present, non-fiction, and a few random reference type books.  Click to embiggen.

 The bookshelf in my bed room contains two shelves with library books, current reads, challenge selections, and my TBR for the year.  After I read one of these non-library book titles I will have to put the book through my collection development ringer.  I either keep it for a good reason or take it to the charity bookshop.  The bottom shelf is empty and that will hold my new purchases.  All of purchases must sit on that shelf until they are read and analyzed for keepablity.  This should cut down on my crazy charity shop buying sprees.

 So what do you think?  I think it will work for me and it seems to make logical sense.  Let me know if you all have any suggestions for improvements!

A Quick Update...

My week off of work ended heavenly.

Sam finished my owl tattoo.

I squeezed in reading and coffee.

I baked whole wheat banana chocolate chip muffins.

I also had lunch with my Dad and he came over to help us build our raised bed for the garden.  I went on a few walks and I enjoyed a lot of sitting back and relaxing.  It was lovely.

Now it is back to work.  I'm tired.  I'm always tired after a vacation.  It is hard to get back to the go go go go go.  I've mountains of work to catch-up on, a huge strategic planning meeting on Thursday (retch), and it is about time to round up graduation holds for folks who have crazy unpaid library fines.

I promise, honest to blog, that I will post my nerdy bookshelf post next time I blog.  I'm hoping that will either be tomorrow or Thursday.  We'll see how things go.  

Dear March, I Love You

Dreadful February is over.  February is my least favorite month and thank goodness it is short.  Thankfully the last few days were awesome and I love ending on a positive note.  I've had a pretty rad 1st day of March as well. 

There's been reading (finished TWO books yesterday), family time, friends, coffee, thrifting, yarn shopping, hair dyeing, knitting group fun, book organizing*, and general peace and happiness.  I even spent some time with Hope but I have no photo documentation (Hope forbade photos because her "hair was weird").

Just a tidbit of what I've been up to:

Playing outdoors with Atticus.  He is learned to say "bird" last week and enjoys watching and listening for birds and tonight he said "moon".  He stretched his little hand up to wave to the moon. 

Thrifted finds:  a cardigan, a lizard brooch, and a board book.  Not pictured: clothing for Atticus and Hope.

More thrifted finds!  A scrapbook that will be my wedding album and a small book nest that will be decoupaged in the near future.  Not pictured: a cap and thrifted print for Sam.

Yarn!  I found this delicious purpley tweed yarn -- love the flecks of turquoise and gold with the purple!

New eye makeup, a brow wax, and a box of hair dye can make a mom feel like a million dollars.

Tomorrow -- a hair trim, some tattoo touch-ups, lunch with my honey, and a bit of reading before the weekend begins.

Happy March to all!

*bookshelf organizing will be discussed in a later post -- I want to go all nerdy on it.