Why I'm Not a Book Blogger

This is week is book blogger appreciation week.  I didn't sign-up to participate "officially" because, well, I don't feel that I've ever quite fit into the book blogging community.  Not REALLY.  To be honest, my book posts usually get the fewest hits.  I tell myself that I really need to get out there and...

• blog more!
• comment more!
• do giveaways and challenges and read-alongs and events!
• start a facebook/tumblr/twitter/flickr just for the blog!
• ARCs!
• Ads!

The truth?  I don't really want to do all of these things.  I may do a some of these things some of the time.  My Charles Dickens month was packed full of giveaways and I  had comments out the whazoo, tons of folks reading, I was in nerd heaven.... but it exhausted me.  I felt pressure -- mostly from my perfectionist self -- to keep going.  I don't know how others manage, but I didn't have the energy to sustain being an active book blogger and have time to read all the books and then have time to review them all on the blog.  Reviewing all of the books became a drag as well.  And I what about all the other parts of my life I want to share: children, baking, stitching, overall nerdiness? 

What I've realized is that I'm an introvert blogger.  It is exhausting to try to "socialize" all the time.  There are some extroverted bloggers I love.  They post a great deal -- and it is all wonderful stuff -- and their involvement in the book blogging community is amazing.  I'm not saying that they are wrong and I'm right... it is that they are different.  In fact, they may be introverted in real life, but their blog allows them to open up in a different way.

I stepped back from labeling myself a book blogger for several reasons besides the pressure.

• advertising pressure:  I really don't want ads on my blog was a big reason; BlogHer is not for me.  No ad swapping. No sponsoring each month. 
• comment overload:  I want people to comment -- mainly to know that there are "kindred spirits in the world -- but I was overwhelmed with the number of comments I had on a few of my posts.  More than 10 and I'm dizzy.  I can't imagine contacting all of these people or responding.  I didn't want the pressure to comment on every post I read. 
• the pressure to return the favor:  I try to comment only when I really have something to add to the conversation or the post has impacted me.  If I add something to my TBR pile based on a book review I post.  If I had a similar breastfeeding experience I post.  If I want to try that recipe because it looks wonderful I post.  If my only response is one generic exclamation then I abstain from posting.  When someone posts on my blog I always check out there blog, but if I see if is mostly romances or paranormal teen lit or something else that doesn't tickle my fancy, I leave a comment, but I don't follow their blog.  I think this harkens back to my desire to only say things with meaning and this reflects my introverted personality.  Let me get something straight... once I know you and I like you, I will talk your ear off (or comment your blog to death)

 I'm comfortable with where I'm at as a "life" blogger.  I do admit, though, that I feel a bit like the awkward geek at the 6th grade lunch table.  I look at the camaraderie among most book bloggers and I'm jealous.  On the other hand, I've seen people get ugly, hurtful, and judgmental over book blogs and I've avoided drama and hurt feelings as well. 

I have a deep affinity with book bloggers, they are my people.  They read.  They love to read.  Literature lights up their world.  

Cheers to book bloggers and non-book bloggers alike.  I believe there is a place for all of us in this big ole world-wide-web world.  Happy book blogger appreciation to all the book bloggers and happy non-book blogger appreciation to all the other awesome blogs. 

The Great Blogcation Debacle

It is a very good thing I went on a Blogcation last week. Not because I necessarily got any rest or relaxation... no.. last week was HORRIBLE.  I had a sinus infection, bronchitis, pinkeye, and Atticus was teething and vomiting from sticking his fingers down his throat.

Picture this.... Monday I was sent home from work due to a violent cough (yay sinus infection turned bronchitis).  I woke Tuesday morning with my right eye swollen shut from pinkeye.  I resolved to stay home in bed and sleep while the kids were at school.  Then Atticus puked.

There I was, lumbering around the house.  Coughing.  Right eye shut.  Nose running.  Unshowered.  One or both boobs hanging out from constant nursing.  Chasing a gleeful toddler who discovered a penchant for vomit.  Tuesday afternoon was a bit better; after Atticus napped and I read Charles Dickens with one eye open Atticus and I played.  He is quite fond of "line things up on the window sill" game. 

Things looked better after Tuesday.  Mostly because I tried to rest.  I read a little on Wednesday afternoon.  I skipped my knitting group to go to bed early on Thursday.  I took Friday off and spent time with Hope (she was out on holiday), exercising, stitching, and napping.  I napped on Saturday and then enjoyed Hope's birthday party.  Sunday it was back to work.  Not a lot of reading, but a whole lot of tea, exercise, and napping.

Okay.  This week WILL be better.  I did, however, finish the softies for Atticus' class.  I made 8 (one for Atticus and then one for each of his classmates).  I didn't get them done until Friday as I thought it best to not stitch things for toddlers whilst suffering from pinkeye.

On to a new week, filled with cautious optimism.

Are you there Blog? It's Me, Amanda

I've tried to make a concerted effort this year to be "real" on this blog.  Not that I was fake before, but I did worry -- like I do in real life -- that people wouldn't like me, or they would be bored, or I would just come off as a weirdo.  While I'll still try to maintain a sense of decorum -- i.e. I've been quite good about not bitching too much or too specifically about work -- I've written about things I wouldn't have written about in the past.

You wouldn't think it would be a big deal, but I was nervous about posting my collection development policy.  Why I was nervous is any one's guess (maybe it wasn't thought out enough, or had silly gaps, or was just a brazen display of unabashed ocd nerdiness), but I had so many comments from other bookish folks about their collections and bookish plans.  It made me so glad. I was piss-my-pants terrified of writing about my issues with binge eating but the response to my binge-eating post had me in happy, warm-fuzzy land.  Knowing that others - fat or thin -- struggle with the same food issues has given me so much courage to Keep Calm and Carry On.  It is the camaraderie of blogging that I love. 

This got me thinking about when and why I started blogging.  It was fall of 2004.  I had graduated from college the year prior and all of my friends moved away after graduation.  Off they went, back to other home cities and states or off to graduate programs and I was left in my little Georgia town.  I was flat broke -- no car, very little money, and extremely isolated.  I didn't know a single soul in G-ville, Georgia who loved reading like I loved reading.  No one wanted to talk Jeanette Winterson essays.  Or Mists of Avalon.  Or Angela Carter short stories.  Added to that I was a single mother and at the time I was dating an absolute moron.  Total isolation.  I went to the local coffee shop with large books in hand, but I just read.  I didn't interact with a soul.  A socially-awkward introvert, I didn't know how to walk up to someone and jump in a conversation... especially with when I tried to open conversations with "have you read A.S. Byatt?"

At this point in time my library where I worked was... for lack of a better word... a joke.  We had no director and just before my arrival several people had quit or "left" and things were a mess.  I was a copy cataloger and, alas, the system was nearly always down leaving me sitting at a desk and playing minesweeper for hours on end.

To combat extreme loneliness and boredom I decided to become a bit more active on some Yahoo book groups.  There I met this lady and this lady.  I don't remember which one of them started blogging first, but once the idea popped into my head, inspired by Andi and Heather, and once I realized "slap my ass and call me Sally there are other book nerds out there!" I was hooked.  I've blogged ever since with one hiatus of four months when I deleted my first blog (The Blog Jar) and decided to take out the trash (moronic boyfriend).

Blogging has led me to make new friendships, discover new things, and I've truly grown as a person -- and no I'm not just talking about my waistline.  I feel accepted and it is quite lovely to know that I can type out my frustrations and happy things and someone out there in the blog-o-sphere understands.

I hadn't intended on writing all of this, but I decided I might as well.  I just wanted to thank everyone who leaves comments and the lurkers.  And thanks for writing such great material out there for me to read.  The great thing about blogging is that it isn't one-sided!

Okay, now it is time to hope off of my Oscar-speech box and head to bed.  Atticus has pinkeye so I'll be home from work tomorrow and chasing a rambunctious little one through the house from 5am on.  G'night!

Dear Darling Blog

www.nataliedee.com


Dear Darling Blog,

I know it is only Friday and we just hung out on Tuesday, but I feel like I haven't seen you in forever.  I went back to work and things have been CRAZY!  Lots to do at work (type file type email schedule mail chat groan).  Lots to do at home (nurse cook clean homework parenting laundry).  And then there are the little quiet things I need to keep me sane (read bake read stitch read knit read crochet read write read).  I have this awful fear that you will slip away and become a mere shadow of your quirky little self.

I value our relationship.  You just really listen so well and you let me say what I want and you like my shitty pictures of all my wee hobbies and the endless cute pictures of the kiddos.  Really what our relationship needs is some prioritizing.  Making time for you is important and I'm not going to let my weirdly placed anxieties (no one will like me) or my more bizarre hobbies (although I don't think OCD organizing of kitchen cupboards at 3am is a hobby) or my crazy life as wife/mother/librarychica keep me from you.

So prioritizing it is.  I made a little schedule so we can talk about our feelings or strengthen our bonds or do what ever the heckfire it is we do here, because I love you, hard.  If I have a topic already in place in my weak little mind then when I do have time for us to hang out it will be much easier to get the ball going.

Ok, Blog, here is my new little blog schedule.  Me making time for you.  Because I care. so. much. for. some. odd. reason.

January
Sunday -- Sunday Salon (a bookish time)
Monday -- Making Monday (recipes, crafts, stitches, etc...)
Tuesday -- Charles Dickens Tuesday
Wednesday -- Web Wanderings (pintrest boards, memes, links, etc)
Thursday -- On the Home Front (mom stuff, marriage stuff, maybe even more recipes)
Friday -- Photo Friday

I'm not sure of the correct way to finish this little letter.  I suppose I could say "you had me at 'new post'".  Or I could just admit that "I can't quit you." But what it comes down to is "you complete me;" for some reason, my little memories and observations bring me joy and peace and happiness.  Blog, you are worth making time to write because when I write about my life in this public of a venue I realize how much I have to appreciate and that always makes my day a bit brighter.

Here's looking at you, Blog.

XOXOXO,
Amanda

Getting Rid of Bah-humbug

Hi!  As I write this I'm trying to choke down some hot tea.  Last night I started running a fever and my throat became swollen and raw.  I took some NyQuil and passed Sam the parenting baton.  As usual with fevers I had weird and disturbing dreams and I woke this morning sore, achy, and still exhausted.  I have a doctor appointment later this morning and I should probably start getting ready. But first, a bit of blog housekeeping....

This past week has been rough.  We had some Unpleasantness at work that led to an employee "leaving."  I spent yesterday afternoon crying.  Despite the awfulness the holiday party went well.  We ate at the Thai restaurant, laughed, exchanged gifts, and it was very nice and uplifting after the horrible day.  Then I started feeling physically rotten.  Between stress and illness and the house being disorganized I find myself being in a bah-humbug mood.

Really this entire week has bee full of moments of pure happiness and then unworldly stress.  I'd love to blog about the lovely cookie exchange earlier in the week, but all the stress prevents me from giving it full attention.

So.... I'm going on a bit of a bloggy hiatus.  I had planned on having a blog-vacation from Saturday the 17th until after Christmas, but I'm going to start a bit early.  I'm going to use the rest of this week to get well, wrap things up at work, and then put the house in order so that I can focus on my family and the holidays next week.

I'll be back after Christmas with holiday updates, bookish news, and new goals for 2012.  I hope you all have a peaceful and blessed holiday!  Also, I'm sending out holiday letters and cards so email me your address if you want one (amanda(dot)L(dot)addison(at)gmail(dot)com).  I love penfriends!

Merry Christmas!

Blog Vacation -- What I did

I must say I need to take planned blog-vacations more often.  To pick a week and say I'm going to to devote it to my family and doing things I love was wonderful.  I feel ready to write and share again.  Normally, I try to MEGA-BLOG when I'm on vacation and that never works.  I can stitch with the wee ones playing, but writing... well, that just isn't going to happen.

So here is what I did on my my Thanksgiving break from work and from blogging

Amassed more embroidery floss...

Hung out with this silly girl.  We caught the Muppets' Movie on Saturday and she got her hair cut...

Finally finished Wolf Hall (more on that later)...

Took advantage of an AMAZING holiday sale and bought more Harney Tea...

Started making the kiddos stockings for Christmas...

Hope helped out a lot... she even raked leaves...

Enjoyed a Thanksgiving day with my family...

Made some chicken stock for the freezer...

Chased one inquisitive toddler and discovered he has a penchant for felt...

baking, of course...

Hope even got her craftiness on and made some holiday ornaments...

Halls are decked and fa-la-la-laing is in full-swing....

Cat cuddles....

Thanksgiving Blog Vacation

At 4:15pm today I will be a free little bird for well-over a week.  Thank you Thanksgiving vacation.  I'm mentally exhausted from drama that has been occurring in several facets of my life.  I'm looking forward to spending a week hanging out with my family.  I have plans for reading, baking, decorating for Christmas, crafts, stitching, and cuddling kids.  I'm taking a blog-cation as well this week.  I'll see you cats on Sunday, November 27!

Hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

A Glimpse at a Giveaway....

Don't forget that tomorrow (as in at midnight, Wednesday 10/26) the giveaway will be closed.  What?  You didn't know I was doing a giveaway!

EDIT:  TWEET THIS GIVEAWAY TO ENTER A SECOND TIME!!!

Basically go to this post and leave me a comment about what you like to see on my blog.  Or you can email me at amanda(dot)l(dot)addison(at)gmail(dot)com and fill me in.  So far only 9 people have commented.

By noon tomorrow I will randomly select a winner and that person will get something coffeeish, something bookish, and this, fuzzy scarf:

 Hurry, quick!  Enter while there is time!

K is for Kill me Now.... Seriously I'm tired of the alphabet crap

I was exhausted this morning.  After two blissful weeks of Atticus sleeping through the night we're back to waking every hour.  I've been hopeful that "this too shall pass" and so I've had a pretty good attitude about my lack of sleep, but now that he is nearly a year-old I feel a hopeless desperation.  How long will this last.  a few more weeks?  Months?  Years? 

So this morning I was exhausted.  The house is a wreck.  I'm supposed to be having a yard sale tomorrow and I'm no where near ready.  The bills still need to be paid.  There is just too much to do and I'm so so so so so tired.

Hope watched Atticus this morning so I could take a quick shower and I had a Good Cry.  An expletive-filled, blubbering, snotty, messy cry.  Then I got out, dressed, dried my hair and prepared to be a Decent Mother.  We went by the library and then came home.  Hope played with Atticus so I could lie down for 30 minutes in the living room.  We went for a glorious walk in the autumn sunshine and I took the kids to eat lunch with daddy at the college cafeteria.  Now, Atticus is napping. 

I'm overwhelmed.  Between work, and kids, and domestic duties, and everything else I'm just tired.  Also, Sam has gone back to tattooing in addition to his usual job.  He loves it and he is so happy, but it means that he cannot help me as much.

Now you may be asking yourself, "what the hell is the point of this post?"  I have no idea.  I'm just in a major funk.

bleh..........................................................

Blogged and Determined (And a Giveaway)

First of all, I am bound and determined to finish all my ABC posts (which were only supposed to last the month of September), participate in my Sunday group reads, blog my Classics Circuit post on the 23rd, AND participate in READATHON on the 22nd of this month.  I'm so bad about starting themed blogger stuff and then dropping off.  I really, really miss my regular blogging. 

Expect some changes soon in November. I think I'm going to go to a daily format or some sort of loose schedule.  Then maybe I can post ahead in those pocket of time I squirrel away for blogging instead of spending my time wondering what the heck to write about.

What I'd like from you all (my few brave readers) is a little bit of feedback.  If you wouldn't mind, leave me a comment about what you'd like to see on Fig and Thistle or shoot me an email at amanda.l.addison(at)gmail(dot)com.  Comment or email by 26 October 2011 and you'll be entered to win a gift box from moi.  Of course, I haven't determined what exactly will go in said box.  Let's just say it will contain something bookish, something coffeeish, and something handmade. Please, U.S. folks only (sorry, I'm so poor).  I will draw a winner via random generator on the 26th!

To get your ideas churning in the ole gray matter, here's a list of ideas:

What subjects do you like most and would like to see with regularity?  What do you hate?

• Book reviews, library loots, and random reading stuff
• Recipes 
• Crafts
• Knitting and embroidery
• Personal / life stuff
• Mommy stuff
• Rants
• Professional stuff -- aka library stuff, particularly about Interlibrary Loan and Resource Sharing
• Memes and blogger events
• Challenges (books, weight loss, knitting, etc...)
• Pintrest boards, items I love, product reviews
• Blogs and links of interest
• Health and weight loss
• Clothes, thrifting, decorating
• Lists
• Movie reviews
• More pictures
• ANY OTHER IDEAS???

Now time for the disclaimer:  I really want feedback, but in the end this blog is a representation of ME.  This means it will never fit into a niche:  books/mom stuff/baking..... I can't just write about one element in my life.

My recent lack of blogging is because I have TOO MUCH to talk about.  I feel stuck and overwhelmed by all I want to share.  I think having a set theme or loose structure will help me focus all these ideas and words and plans busting outta my brain.

Alright folks, share the love.

Hi, how are you?

I am in bed right now with a book of short stories and an icy Diet Coke (hence the attempt at blogging from my phone). Actually, i didn't realize what a pain typing from a touchscreen can be. 

I promise I will get back to blogging soon.  I just feel like my blogging mojo is broken.  I got fed up with WordPress, switched to Blogger, and lost my will to blog.

Hopefully it will be back soon.

Goodbye Wordpress, Hello Blogger

I've been trotting along whipping out my little ABC blog posts and then all of a sudden I decide to change blog hosts and I throw my entire blogging schedule off track.  I was going to spend the morning blogging at a furious rate to catch-up and get ahead, but it looks like this outside:

I've spent the morning hanging out with Atticus (he went to daycare before 9:30) and reading with a caramel macchiato by my side.  It is too pretty to spend all day behind the computer.  Oh well, the ABCs will resume tomorrow and I'll get the entire alphabet done, but maybe not at the rate of 6 posts a week. 

So why the sudden switch back to Blogger? 

1. I've had problems from the get-go with Wordpress.  All of my previous blog, The Blog Jar, didn't import.  I can't easily use widgets from GoodReads.  I can't upload YouTube videos.  Adding a photo takes FOREVER.  It uploads slowly.  It keeps dumping my twitter linking.  And periodically it just doesn't work.  Frustration.
2. While writing the ABC posts, I've been going through old Blog Jar posts trolling for pictures.  Looking back, I really like the look and feel of the Blogger blog and I like the continuity.  I switched to WordPress last summer, mid-way through my pregnancy and because everything didn't import correctly I feel like the Blog Jar is lovely reading that gets cut-off (much like finding missing pages in a book or something like that). 

So I'm back to blogger.  I'll keep WordPress up for the next week and then I'm deleting it.  Please come visit me here!

all quiet on the bloggy front

Sorry the blog is so quiet.  My computer is dead, dead, dead.  My wonderful computer-geek brother is sprucing up one of his old laptops for me, but it is still in the works.  I should be back to blogging next week.  Fingers crossed!