R.eaders I.mbibing P.eril VII

Cheers to heralding in Autumn!  Carl's 7th year of hosting the RIP challenge is upon us.  Grab a mystery or something spooky and join in.  I'll be participating in several of the challenges: 

Peril the First:
I will be reading at least four creepy novels for this challenge.  In my choice pool I have The Little Stranger by Sarah Waters (also a RIP read-along), the Harry Potter series (a non-RIP associated read-along),  Desperate Remedies by Thomas Hardy, Aurora Floyd by Mary Elizabeth Braddon, Lilith by George MacDonald, Locke and Key: Clockworks by Joe Hill, and a few volumes of Bill Willingham's Fables series.
Peril of the Short Story:
In October I will be reading The Haunted Dolls' House and Other Ghost Stories by MR James.

Peril on the Screen:
I plan to watch 5-7 creepy movies this autumn.  There's nothing better than getting good and scared.

A short and sweet post today.  I'm eager to get through the work day and crack open some books! 

This may be my most brilliant idea EVER!

 I love it when a solution to one problem effectively knocks out another problem.  It makes me feel all efficient.

Problem the First:  Halloween.  I love Halloween.  It isn't so much the scary, creepy aspects. Don't get me wrong, I love a good Gothic novel or Vincent Price film, but what I love about Halloween is that it is so quintessentially Autumn.  Pumpkins, leaves, the smell of Autumn night air, treats.... love it ... LOVE IT.  I like taking the kids trick-or-treating, but like giving out the candy even more.  It is my favorite thing to do.  The problem is that no one does trick-or-treating in our area. Folks go to the mall or to the local square in hordes:  they line up, grab candy, and leave.  Lame.  Even more lame.... the parents who drive their kids from house to house -- like even houses next door to one another -- so the kids can loot for candy.  No fun... no admiring costumes or jumping out of bushes.  Just grab the candy and run.  Sigh.  I want an old-school Halloween.

Problem the Second:  Hope has the unfortunate luck of having a February birthday.  February sucks. If there is any month out of the year that we will get sick it is February.  It is also a shorter month, which means that those of use paid weekly are screwed (ack! Rent is due... I feel like I just paid the rent!).  Hope has been bummed because I'm having a c-section a week before her birthday and now her plans for a sleepover are ruined.  I told Hope that instead of a sleepover I would get Sam to take her and three of her friends to the mall for pizza, a movie, and giggly shopping.  I bet you can guess how excited Sam is for that!

I was thinking about what to do for Atticus's birthday party (his birthday is October 27th) and I had decided to do a Halloween theme when I was hit by brilliance:  ONE GIANT HALLOWEEN PARTY BIRTHDAY BLOWOUT FOR THE KIDS. 

I've thought about doing one big party a year instead of two -- and eventually three -- kid parties a year.  It would save money and time.  I also want to get away from birthdays equaling getting loads of gifts.  I like the celebratory fun of a party, but with out all the mass consumerism. Gifts are cool, but the kids get sooooo much.  Just think -- Mom and Dad, grandparents, other relatives, and then each party guest.  They end up with more stuff then at Christmas and then mama has to figure out where to put it all. Instead, I am going to do one big party with gifts optional (grandparents' will most likely still spoil the kids) and then on each child's birthday give them their one gift and make them a favorite meal. 

I tentatively approached the subject with Hope, fully expecting her to declare it "lame."  She loved the idea! 

My brain is filled to bursting with ideas and here are the basic ideas we've come up with:

The Basics:  The main party for everyone will be from 4pm to 7pm which won't interfere with nap time.  After the little kids leave Hope can have her friends stay for sleepover festivities. 

I like this.... sans balloons.  The balloons look like sperm... ick.

Activities:  All the kids in costumes!  A Great Pumpkin hunt (like an Easter Egg hunt, but not).  Making monster puppets. Hope's friends will have their Great Pumpkin hunt after the little ones leave, with flashlights, and some scariness... Mwhahahaahaa.... They will probably also watch Phantom of the Opera and Snow White and the Huntsman.  Oh yes.... and cookie decorating. 

Decorations:  Carved pumpkins.  String lights.  Paper Jack-o-lanterns in the window.  "Monster eyes" in the yard.  Bat bunting....Tables, chairs, quilts spread out....  Sam insists there must be a pinata. 

Food:  Candy will be hidden for the Pumpkin hunt, but there will be dinner food as well. FYI -- I don't do food that looks like body parts.... no ma'am.  For dinner: clementines with jack-o-lantern faces, apple slices, a veggie tray, "mummies"(pigs in a blanket), bread, crock pot chili (one vegetarian, one meat).  For beverages: juice or milk boxes for the kids.  Water, soda, or crock pot apple cider or pumpkin spice lattes for the adults. The cake will be various Halloween themed cupcakes. 

This is going to be so much fun!

Readerly Rambles: 08/29/2012

What I've read:  The Marriage Plot by Jeffery Eugenides.  I have so much to say about this book that I'm reserving my comments for its own post (possibly next Sunday?).

What I'm reading:  I'm beginning a biography of Sylvia Plath called Rough Magic.  Reading a Plath biography is such a loaded experience.  It isn't merely reading about her life that fascinates me... it is all the different interpretations of her life that fascinates me.  Since reading The Silent Woman; I'm especially intrigued by Plath and attempts at her biography.  I'm thinking this will be my last book for August.  And August will bring so many new things!

I've also recently begun an audiobook I'm actually enjoying; The Return of the Native as read by Alan Rickman.  Victorian novel + Alan Rickman = nerd girl swoon. 

What's Up Next:  I'm so excited for September reading.  I still need to get together a list of creepy autumnal reads, but I know that I will have no less than three books going and they are each vastly different.  I will be reading Dr. Sear's Attatchment Parenting book and I will be embarking upon three read-a-longs.  First off, I'm joining in Fanda's Gone with the Wind read along.  I've shunned this book because I'm a Georgia gal and I really resent the blushing, devious Southern Belle stereotype.  Also, I'm a direct descendent of Robert E. Lee, but I'm so ashamed of my being Southern (I have severe white guilt) that I dropped my middle name of Lee and I run fleeing from anything "too Southern."  The second read along is a Harry Potter read along and I will be re-re-re-reading the series. Most exciting to me is the read along hosted by the Estella Society:  The Little Stranger.  I've had this on my TBR list for YEARS. 

Other Bookish News:  I spent last weekend working as a babysitter for the library; the building was rented out to a high school yearbook camp and I was on "security detail."  The extra pay is awesome and I am using most of it to buy the family a PS3.  Right now we don't have cable and only a crappy laptop that is too slow for Netflix.  I'm really looking forward to streaming movies and Sam and Hope are looking forward to some gaming.  I will have some money left over and I'm going to be completely selfish and buy some books.  I figure since I worked 12 days in a row with no weekend I deserve it.  I have my eyes on all of the Anthony Trollope novels in the Penguin English Library series.  ERMEGHERD!

Okay, happy reading to all!

101 Things in 1001 Days... An Update

Yes, I am a Lego nerd

On December 16th, 2011 I made myself some goals... 101 things I want to achieve in the space of 1001 days.   My end date for this "challenge" is 09/12/2014.  I promised to pop-in and update on things and I really thought every six months would be a great. Here it is late August and I really should have updated in June.  Better late than never.

Tasks Completed:

• Buy a new car (March 2012)
• Weekend trip with Sam (April 2012)
• Visit a new city (Chattanooga, May 2012)
• Collection Development policies written (December 2011)
• Take a cake decorating class (January 2012)
• Redecorate office (June 2012)
• Put together a giant Lego set (December 2011, Diagon Alley)
• Drive 985 by myself (December 2011)
• Participate in a charity event (St. Baldrick's shavee July 2012, bake sale August 2012)

In Progress:

• Lose 75 pounds (lost 25, on hold due to pregnancy)
• Have a baby (due February 2013!)
• Visit 5 different museums (2 down -- Fernbank Natural Science and the High Museum of Art)
• Get 5 more tattoos (2 down -- coffeepot on right wrist, teapot on left wrist) 
• Pay off Hope's braces (1/2 way there!)
• See 3 concerts (1 down -- Explosions in the Sky! 06/2012)
• 3 Readathons (1 down -- April 2012 readathon)

That isn't too shabby.... nine completed and seven in progress.  Technically, I only have 92 tasks to complete and 746 more days to do.  

Thoughts and Suggestions for Once-a-Month Shopping?

One of my best character traits is that I'm an all-or-nothing person.  One of my more terrible character traits is that I'm an all-or-nothing person.  If I can't do something 100%, then I probably won't do it all.  However, I find that I really need to learn how to do a bit and make it work.

I'm thinking about all of this because of grocery shopping.  I've tried once-a-month cooking in huge swoops where I spend 12 hours in the kitchen.  I've tried subsisting on cereal or sandwiches for dinner.  I've tried giant once-a-month shopping trips and gave up when I realized it didn't work for me to buy 80% of a month's food in one shopping trip.  And now, my once a week shopping just isn't working.

Here Is what I currently do:

• I spend roughly $140-$160 a week on groceries (this includes all toiletries and diapers).
• This totals to about $640 a month. 
• I shop once a week at Publix.  I am a hardcore Publix fan.
• I coupon.
• I spend my Friday night planning meals for the upcoming week.

Here are the problems with my current system:

• Our grocery expense is our third largest expense.  Rent is first, then daycare, and then grocery.
• Our rent is cheap for a three bedroom, two bath house.  Daycare is discounted since it is through my employer.  This means if I really want to significantly trim my budget, I need to cut grocery spending.
• We will have less money very soon.  My maternity leave at work is very generous.  I get 12 weeks paid maternity leave, but because so many employees took the full twelve weeks of paid leave and then never came back, the university had to alter the policy.  When I go on leave in February, I will get 70% of my pay and then when I return to work I will get the remaining 30%.  This means we will be living on a reduced budget while I'm on leave as Sam and I contribute equally to our household income.  Also, beginning in May, daycare will shoot up to be our most expensive bill.  Yikes.  I need to start living on the cheap (or cheaper than I already am) now.
• I'm really tired of spending two+ hours every week combing through coupons and cookbooks, constructing meals that suit our busy work days, and trying to figure out how to save us money.  I'd rather spend my Friday nights reading.
• The above weekly system will certainly not work with a newborn infant.  I'll be unable to drive for four weeks after the c-section and then taking a baby on a long shopping trip every week is not exactly fun and I don't want to have to pump just to go to the store.

A Goal:

• My goal is to reduce us down to spending $500 a month total on groceries, diapers, cleaning supplies, and toiletries.  This will save us up to $1,800 a year which works out to 12 weeks of daycare for one child or six weeks of daycare for the two littlest Ropers. 

 A Possible Answer?

• Once a Month shopping seems to be an answer.  I get the groceries in one trip.  I plan the meals for the month.  Voila!

Okay, Maybe Not a Complete Answer?  A Few Issues: 

• When I was a single mama, I was able to stock up.  Once I bought 12 boxes of Cheerios for less than $7 total thanks to a rad Publix sale and couponing.  That cereal last me and a 7-year-old Hope six months.  Now that I'm married to a Hagrid-sized man, I find that if it is available it gets eaten. Sam pours his cereal into a giant mixing bowl (God help us when Atticus is a teen!) and a bag of Lays or a 1/2 gallon of Edy's is a snack.  He is a large, powerful man with a physically demanding day job and now that we have one car he bikes everywhere.  I . cannot. get. him. full.  Hope is a picky tweenager and her only food groups (if she had her way) would be carbs and ketchup.  My having less "fun food" she may actually have to eat a non-starchy veggie.
• Sam and I get paid weekly, which works out pretty well.  However it is really difficult  to plan and save for a $500 grocery trip.  Seriously.
• Practicality.  As much as I would like to, I'm not going to prepare seven home-cooked lovely dinners a week.  I will probably make four home-cooked meals a week with the remaining three being leftovers or sandwiches or a frozen pizza.  I not only need items for meals, but things that are easy for Sam to make when I'm at work or for those days when we really don't want to do very many dishes.
• Space.  I'm cool with my pantry, but I only have my refrigerator freezer.  Stuffing it with a month's worth of meat, frozen veggies, and a few convenience items will quickly fill it up.  Keep in mind, I also have to allot for gobs of breast milk next year!

Doh! 

Here is my issue!  I've hit on it.  I've been trying to do Once a Week Shopping vs. Once a Month Shopping.  One or the other.... one or the other... How about a little of both?  Why do I feel the need to do all or nothing?

The Plan:

•  I have planned meals for the month of September:  four meals a week with three "wildcard" meals which means sandwiches, leftovers, a frozen pizza, dinner out, etc....
• My experimental budget is $350 for the first week, with $50 allotted each week for the rest of the month.  This will usually total to $500 a month.
• The first week I will shop at Sam's (a bulk shopping center) and buy meat, cheese, pasta, beans, and other basics for meals.  I will also buy toiletries, pet items, baking supplies, diapering needs, and cleaning materials.  I will pick up just enough milk, chips, cereal, and produce for the week.
• Each week after I will take $50 and pick up milk, on sale cereal and bread, chips and other lunch bag items, and produce.
• I've informed Sam and the kids that mama is no longer buying ice cream, cookies, and cakes with grocery money.  I get those things on sale and with coupons, but they aren't part of a meal and they tend to be obliterated in the space of a few days.  If we want those treats we need to use our spending money.  I don't know about you, but I rather buy books than a gallon of ice cream!
• Instead of quick treats, I am going to try to make a dessert one night a week or a batch of cookies for lunches for the week.  I can make those things cheaply and I actually know what goes in the items I bake; they aren't chock full of additives and in unnecessary packaging.
• I'm also experimenting with making some homemade cleaners and baby wipes.  That should save me some cash.  

The Answer?: 

We'll have to see how this goes, but I think I've hit on a good plan.  I've got the best of both worlds.  I'm buying those more expensive items like meat and diapers in bulk, which will reduce their cost.  I'm avoiding the family gorging on a month's worth of cereal, but I'm keeping fresh produce and milk on the table so to speak. 

I'm certainly open to hints, suggestions, or your stories about once-a-month-shopping or grocery budgets in general. 

Wish me luck!

On Serendipitous Reading

Right now it is a Saturday and I'm babysitting the library for a yearbook camp.  I'm being paid by the camp and not the library, so I'm not doing library work.  Instead -- loads of patrolling and making sure our art collection isn't harmed by over-excited teens (seriously we have millions of dollars worth of art in here and that's no hyperbole) and the patrolling is punctuated by bits of reading, book lusting, and -- of course -- blogging catch-up.

Being in the library, clicking through beautiful book covers online, reading, and finally seeing the shelves -- you wouldn't believe how much library work is computer time and not shelf time -- has led to an afternoon of musing about serendipitous reading. 

It all started -- unbeknownst to me -- with reading Uncle Silas earlier this summer.  That Victorian-gothy novel centers around a girl, Maud, her father's death, and her misfortune of becoming evil Uncle Silas's ward.  The works and teachings of the Christian mystic and philosopher Emanuel Swedenborg figures predominately in the plot.  I didn't realize this at first, but through textual clues I was able to infer that Swedenborg was weird and part of Maud's issue is that her father had some strange ideas and friends from being a believer in this peculiar offshoot of Christianity and Science and Phantasm.  Interesting.

Next I picked up Deborah Blum's Ghost Hunters: William James and the Search for Scientific Proof of Life After Death.  Lo and behold, Henry James Sr. (father to William James and author Henry James Jr.) was a believer the teachings of Emanuel Swedenborg and -- guess what? -- he was a bit batty too.  The book offers a brief explanation of Swedenborg; he was a scientist who essentially left science based on a belief in the otherworldly.  The explanation prefaces the constant struggle between science and spiritualism that Blum so effectively traces.  It also explains why it wasn't far-fetched for William James to be open to the possibility of science and spiritualism finding common ground.  This brief explanation of Swedenborgism also cleared up some mysteries in Uncle Silas.  At one part in the novel, Maud and her aunt are discussing evil Uncle Silas and the wind howls and they feel as if the elements were expressing Uncle Silas's fury at being discussed... in fact, they almost feel watched by the not present Uncle.  In Ghost Hunters, Blum explains that Swedenborg believed that letting go of one's earthly ego allows one to become closer to nature and you can -- to some extent -- see or control things through natural elements.  It also explains the odd diet of  cakes that Maud's father dined on and the strange trances of Uncle Silas; Swedenborg lived on sweets and advocated trances for spiritual transcendence.

While I was reading Blum's book, I decided I needed a fictional companion to my nonfiction spiritualism reading.  I randomly picked up a small anthology of ghost stories -- Famous Ghost Stories, published by Modern Library -- and began to read.  I read one horrifying story entitled "The Man Who Went Too Far" by E F Benson.  Chilling.  Well looky there... Blum's book mentions that E F Benson and some of this relatives were involved with the small community of scientist seeking to research spiritualism.

Serendipity indeed.

I wonder if it is because I was in the mood for something hinting at autumn in its ghostiness and it really wasn't so much serendipity, but on the other hand I could have picked countless other books with "spirits" and not had Mr. Swedenborg popping in or maybe he's influenced all of my previous ghost-reading and I just never realized it until now.  Or maybe, somewhere, some powerful Swedenborg believer is using the power of books to infiltrate my brain.  Something interesting for me to chew on.  Or become paranoid about.

Anticipating Autumn

I cannot wait for August to be over with and September to begin.  September 1st marks *my* autumn season.  I don't care if the weather is still muggy and warm, I will don a cardigan, sip tea, and hunt for golden, falling leaves.  I double dare you to challenge me.

August is a month of waiting.  Waiting for the kids to move up a grade or classroom, waiting for the college students to return, waiting for textured tights and tweedy skirts to go on sale, and, of course, Pumpkin Spice latte season begins on September 6th.  August is also a month of planning.  I've learned that homemade Christmas gifts and crafts are best begun in early autumn because I make things slowly and am frequently distracted by books. 

The rest of this month is made up with a heap of planning and I've got some exciting -- to me -- things underway:

Books -- September 1st marks the beginning of my FAVORITE reading challenge, Carl's R.eader's I.mbibing P.eril challenge.  I'm piling up books for that challenge.  I'm also planning on joining in a Gone with the Wind read-along.  Also Read-a-Thon should be happening some time in October. I will also be embarking on a quest to listen to all of the Harry Potter audio books.

Food -- Every Friday I plan meals for the next week.  I pour through cookbooks and store ads and it pretty much consumes my entire evening.  I don't have enough up front cash to do once-a-month-grocery shopping (Sam and I are paid weekly), but I CAN plan out a month of menus and at least buy meat and paper items (diapers, toilet paper, etc...) once a month.  For the month of September I'm going to attempt a month-long meal plan. 

That isn't the exciting part; the exciting part is that I've decided that every Saturday (from September until January at the very least) I am going to declare a soup-making day.  Yes... Souper Saturday.  Soups are cheap, filling, can be healthy, and are pretty delicious.  Commence soup planning... ohhhh... maybe I should add some bread baking in on Saturdays! 

Vacation -- My job has a pretty generous vacation leave policy.  Nearly everyone in the office saves their vacation for the late spring and summer months.  Blah.... I hate beaches and since being credit card free, Sam and I can't dole out the cash for vacations that last more than a day.  So I take my vacation in the fall and winter months.  Sam gets less time than I do, so sometimes I find myself with a week of vacation, the kids in school and daycare, and Sam at work.  I use that time to prep for the holidays, do some cleaning, bake to my hearts content and, yes, read. 

Halloween -- I'm planning a separate blog post to discuss my brilliant Halloween plans for this year.  I'll bring more on that later.

Yarn -- I've been in a knitting/crocheting/embroidery funk.  I've pretty much wanted to do nothing but sleep or read in my spare time.  Cooler temperatures always tempt me to take up some sort of cozy work.  Perhaps I can finish my crochet cushion covers by the end of the month and start something else (a baby blanket perhaps?).  I so over my intricate and arty embroidery piece.  I've been working on it since last September and I think it is time for it to go on hiatus.  I may finish one of my 5 million other WIPs (only a slight hyperbole) or -- gasp -- start something new. 

To say I'm quivering with anticipation over the slow approach of autumn would be an understatement.  Cheers for sweaters, tea, and chilly mornings under a quilt. 

Oh My... How Pinteresting: 08/16/12

Hey you guys!  I actually completed a pin! This one to be precise. Yup. I made homemade baby wipes.  I took an empty ice cream bucket, a roll of Viva paper towels, 2 cups boiled and then cooled water, a tablespoon of baby oil, and two tablespoons of baby wash and then followed the directions.  They are moist and don't irritate Atticus's rump. The one issue I had is with tearing the wipes off the roll,  Next time I am going to take the time to tear the pieces off the roll and stack them, perhaps that would make a difference.  Oh, and the directions say to slice the roll in half, but I find that increases the tearing and you end up using more wipes because they shred. I'll let you know when I revamp this pin.

This means I have one pin down and 3-6 more pins to do for the Pin it and Do it challenge.  I better get my butt in gear. Of course, it is way easier to just increase my pin boards with pins galore.  Here are some pins that are looking mighty pinteresting this week:

I LOVE Halloween, but we don't ever get trick-or-treaters down our little street (the sidewalks suck). So Atticus is getting a Halloween party for his second birthday in late October.  This pin is brilliant: cut "eyes" out of paper towel tubes and hide them in the yard with glow sticks inside!

I do love peanut brittle, but fall-infused brittle.  OMG!

One of my all time favorite bloggers has made some wicked-delicious looking homemade coffee creamers.  I could have Pumpkin Spice year round!!!

Taters, precious

This, my friends, is happening to the microwave at work. For serious. 

Obviously you can tell by most of my posts that I am ready for my favorite season -- Autumn -- to begin.  I'll pin-myself into thinking it isn't 85 degrees in Georgia!

Readerly Rambles: 08/15/2012

What I've Read:  Monday night I stayed up way too late to finish Deborah Blum's Ghost Hunter's: William James and the Search for Scientific Proof of Life After Death.  This is a book that I've checked-out of the library at least three times, yet I never made it to actually reading it.  I'm so glad I finally picked it up because I was riveted. 

Blum explores the Victorian and Edwardian fascination with Spiritualism and focuses on a small group of English and American scientists, philosophers, and psychologists who attempted to make the exploration of the spiritual an actual science.  Despite the scientist prodigious work, lengthy research and experiments,and skeptic's eye, the scientific community pretty much blackballed those in psychical research even though some of the scientists went on to win knighthoods, prizes, and many other distinctions for their innovations in biology, chemistry, and physics.  Blum explores the scientifc communities backlash being grounded in the schism between Darwinian theories of natural selection and evolution  and religion.  Science wanted nothing to do with religion and strongly viewed religion as a sign of weakness in man.  James and other scientists, however, viewed the belief in religion, afterlife, or spirits as something that helps Man aspire to morality and they questioned the ideal of a soulless society.

In addition to all of the scientific information, Blum also details eerily details of unexplainable psychical phenomena and showcases the many fraudulent spiritualists that teemed the streets of London and New York. 

If you loved Sarah Waters' novel Affinity, enjoy science history presented in a narrative fashion, and have an interest in the Victorian / Edwardian era, then you will greatly enjoy this book.  But, in the words of Reading Rainbow, "don't take my word for it!"

What I'm Reading:  I'm nearly done with my volume of ghost stories.  I've read 11 of the 16 stories and I'm confident enough to say that this is the most finely chosen ghost story anthology I've ever read.  One story was humorous and another not frightening but intriguing, but the rest of the stories have scared the living daylights out of me.  In fact, Friday night I was at home reading, with a mug of tea in hand, and the kids were asleep.  Sam was out for the evening and I was enjoying a lovely night of solitude.  It began to rain and that rain turned into a storm; or, as my grandma would say, " a gullywasher."  Lightening cracked and a river seemed to be forming in my front yard.  I heaved off the couch to make some more tea (decaf, of course) and while walking to the kitchen I glanced outside the sunroom window.  At that moment, a huge bolt of lightning cracked across the sky illuminating the rivulets of water forming outside.  I was reminded of the scene in the Woman in Black film with the dead ghosty children in the rain.  I scared myself to death, ran to my bedroom, and decided to not look out the window.  The stories had put me in a creeped out mood and then the storm just did me in.  To compound the horrors I realized I was out of decaf Earl Grey.

What's Up Next:  I'm going to change things up a bit and read a parenting book and some literary fiction.  I interlibrary loaned a copy of Mayim Bialik's attachment parenting book entitled Beyond the Sling and I plan on starting Jeffrey Eugenides' The Marriage Plot.  August is shaping up to be an excellent reading month.

Happy Reading, y'all!

That's What's Up

Hope started her first day of 7th grade on Friday

She isn't the only one moving up.  Atticus has left the toddler class and moved to the two-year-old room.

My Ghost Hunters book freaking rocks.

Atticus is still attempting to steal Daddy's coffee.

On Saturday we took Atticus to "touch a truck."  He was wowed!

Sam has more chalk art at the coffee shop.  Brazilian inspired street are and a Guatemalan worry doll for Inman Perk's single origin blends. 

And a Costa Rican Victory mask

That's what's up around here.  My home life is so happy right now.  I've pushed the mean girl drama at work out of my brain and I'm focusing on all of my joys.

Weight Loss: A Pregnancy Reassessment

The beginning of this year marked my dedication to losing weight and getting healthy.  I upped my water intake, exercised hard 3-5 times a week, and ate well.  I dropped 25 pounds and two sizes from January 1st until mid-May.  I was right on target with my goal of losing a safe 4-5 pounds a month.  Then I got pregnant.  We threw caution to the wind once and ... well... here I am 13 weeks pregnant.

I am over the moon with joy, but this teeny little part of me is frustrated.  Not with the baby, but frustrated that the 25 lbs (of the 146 lbs I needed to lose) could come back. Frustrated with none of my clothes fitting and of being in that weird place where I don't look pregnant yet, but I just look like I'm letting myself go and gaining weight. I had planned on not continuing to attempt weight loss, but to still track my food and eat healthy so I don't gain excessive weight.

Then the nausea hit.  The smell of vegetables and fruit make me hurl.  I also just today had a half-cup of coffee and it tasted delicious.  The past 6 weeks I've abhorred the smell of coffee, broccoli, oranges, spinach, "flavorful food"... "nutritious food."  I've subsisted on fried fish sandwiches, chicken, bread, and taters.  I think the only veggies I've actually kept in stomach include Caesar salad and sweet potatoes. 

I felt like a Miss Fatty Failure.

I decided to just concentrate on three things to work on in my early pregnancy:  1). water intake, 2). prenatal vitamin, and 3). sleep.  I am exhausted constantly.  I mean, I am pregnant, nursing, working full time (with some added drama from workplace drama queens), and I have a teen, a tot, and a husband.  I haven't done any exercising or completed any of my stitching projects in favor of napping and sleeping every chance I get. 

I will say I've noticed that I haven't put on weight as quickly as I did when I was pregnant with Atticus.  I was in maternity clothes by 8 weeks pregnant.  Now I am 13 weeks and I've just now donned maternity wear and I'm still wearing a few stretchy pre-pregnancy things.  I am not nearly as hungry as I was with Atticus, during that pregnancy my blood sugar kept dangerously dropping and I craved sweet tea, Mexican food, steak, and spinach.  I ate and ate and ate and was never full.  I'm not feeling that way now, so I'm hoping that means that I can control my weight a bit and not let it spiral out of control. 

The second trimester usually starts about 13/14 weeks and on Wednesday I will be 14 weeks along.  I've come up with new goals for this trimester:  1) start logging my food again, 2) attempt to add in fruits and veggies, and 3) go for a walk 3 times a week. I'm constantly thirsty so keeping up with water isn't a problem and my prenatal vitamin is a habit now so I feel okay with adding other goals.  Sam is encouraging me to sleep as often as possible and he never makes me feel guilty.

My ultimate goal is to have a healthy pregnancy and healthy baby.  Baby #3 will be born around February 9th and I'll be on maternity leave until about May 1st.  That gives me time to recover from surgery (c-section and tubes tied), get my milk supply well-established, and start exercising again. 

In thinking ahead, I was overwhelmed when Atticus was born. I had Hope vaginally and didn't expect the pain and discomfort of a c-section (folks who tell you c-sections are easier haven't had a baby vaginally... c-sections suck) and Atticus had horrible colic stemming from a dairy intolerance. All of a sudden the healthy yogurt, cheese, muffins, etc... were making my kid sick.  I was hungry and felt like everything would make my baby ill (y'all dairy is in EVERYTHING).  I'm better prepared this go.  I have my list of dairy-free snacks and I'm planning on doing some freezer meals sans dairy.  JUST IN CASE.  I'm also stocking up on groceries early and overall preparing for the recovery from a c-section.  After I had Hope I spent maybe two days feeling crummy (I had to get some... ahem... stitches) and then besides being tired I was bebopping around the house.   With Atticus I was swelling from pitocin to the point my skin was splitting, I had an incision that reopened, and I was frustrated that it seemed to take my milk longer to get in.  I was so determined to have a "nuts and berries hippie sunshine birth" that I refused to read about c-sections, tour the OR, or prepare for a potential operation.  I have to have a c-section this time and I'm determined to not go into it scared and ignorant. 

What does all that rambling about childbirth have to do with weight loss?  A lot.  I'm a perfectionist.  I say I'm doing the weight loss for health, but I am doing it for vanity just as much.  I want to feel pretty and wear what I want and I feel like less of a woman if I don't match that ideal of  how a woman should look.  I wanted a natural childbirth because it is best for baby (in my opinion) but also because I wanted to feel powerful and independent in my own body... I felt like I would be copping out by getting a c-section.  I want to be a perfect mama from birth onward. I have to accept that my body is my body is my body and this body isn't ever going to be the "ideal" anything, because the ideal woman is a myth air-brushed, edited, and manufactured by patriarchy.

I think liking your own physicality is a difficult thing for a plus-sized woman.  On one hand I believe we should like ourselves and feel beautiful and confident.  On the other hand I have big issues with the fat acceptance movement.  That deserves its own post that will probably make me an outcast fat girl, but I will say one issue I have with fat acceptance is that it almost advocates for passivity with weight loss.  When I started trying to lose weight after college I weighed 356 pounds.  When I renewed my commitment to health this past January I weighed 296 pounds.  Sure... my numbers were good (cholesterol, sugar, blood pressure), but I wasn't healthy.  Or maybe I am healthy now, but I know that if I am 296 at age 50 I will be suffering.  I've seen my overweight relatives struggle with fatigue, joint pain, foot issues, and other ailments. I want to be hiking, getting tattooed, and running around with grandkids.  Not on the couch suffering from wear and tear exacerbated by weight.  Fat acceptance seems to say "I love myself.. I'm confident... I'm sexy.. and I'm going to stay this way!!!"  Fat acceptance to me should be "I love myself. I'm confident.  I'm sexy. And I love myself enough to change for a healthier, longer life."

That's the plan:  healthy pregnancy, healthy recovery, healthy breastfeeding, and then back to losing weight so I can wear those cute dresses and live to a ripe old age. 

My Favorite Classic: A Classics Club Meme

One favorite classic. One. A single book that defines what I think is a classic and which classic defines me as a reader.  Hummmm....

My first inclination is to not play by the rules. Why not list a dozen, 7, heck, my top three?  I'll behave myself and list my favorite classic.  I've really had to mull this over for several days, because I realized my favorite classic isn't really my favorite.  Normally I tell folks that The Count of Monte Cristo is my favorite. But that is only a half-truth.  I've read the book twice and I will say I love the fast-paced drama of the book and the dark, brooding Byronic nature of Edmund Dantes...but, well the last 200 pages kinda falls apart.  Everything begins to be neatly resolved, Edmund is repentant, and then there is the odd relationship between himself and his slave girl / princess that I don't quite understand. 

Hummmm... obviously I need to define my criteria for a favorite classic. 

1. The prose is beautifully written and constructed
2. The characters have depth, life, and are believable
3. The book reflects real life; meaning that there is humor, pathos, family, conflict, joy, death, hope, etc....
4. I find myself longing to read it and thinking about out it randomly long after it has been read.

Okay, I know my favorite classic:

Intricately plotted with mystery, murder, poverty, secrets, love, humor... everything.  And wrapped up in some of the most beautiful writing I've ever encountered:

"One disagreeable result of whispering is that it seems to evoke an atmosphere of silence, haunted by the ghosts of sound-strange cracks and tickings, the rustling of garments that have no substance in them, and the tread of dreadful feet that would leave no mark on the sea-sand or the winter snow."

 “Fog everywhere. Fog up the river where it flows among green airs and meadows; fog down the river, where it rolls defiled among the tiers of shipping, and the waterside pollutions of a great (and dirty) city.... Chance people on the bridges peeping over the parapets into a nether sky of fog, with fog all round them, as if they were up in a balloon and hanging in the misty clouds.”

“... Implacable November weather. As much mud in the streets, as if the waters had but newly retired from the face of the earth, and it would not be wonderful to meet a Megalosaurus, forty feet long or so, waddling like an elephantine lizard up Holborn Hill. Smoke lowering down from chimney-pots, making a soft black drizzle, with flakes of soot in it as big as full-grown snow-flakes — gone into mourning, one might imagine, for the death of the sun. Dogs, undistinguishable in mire. Horses, scarcely better; splashed to their very blinkers. Foot passengers, jostling one another’s umbrellas, in a general infection of ill-temper, and losing their foot-hold at street-corners, where tens of thousands of other foot passengers have been slipping and sliding since the day broke (if the day ever broke), adding new deposits to the crust upon crust of mud, sticking at those points tenaciously to the pavement, and accumulating at compound interest.”

 Love it.  Every stinking word.  Bleak House it is, my most favorite, treasured classic. 

Top Ten Tuesday: My Top Bookish Posts

"Top Ten Posts On Your Blog That Would Give The BEST Picture of YOU (as a reader and a person — so pick the 10 best reviews/posts that you wish every potential reader of your blog would see!)"

These posts represent me mostly as a reader, but are still very much tied to who I am as a person.

On Babies, Books, and E-ReadersA discussion on book, motherhood, and the potential e-reader in my life.

My Collection Development Policy
Go ahead, view how anal and how nerdy I am all at once.  You can really see all of my bookish tastes with this post.

The Night Circus: A Recipe
A book review in recipe format

Top 50 Books
More clues to my self in my favorite books.

Atticus as a Beloved Dickens' Character
Harty har har

A Library Loot of a Somber Nature
Bemoaning the awful budget cuts to my public library

The kids are alright...
A review of sorts

If you can't say anything nice...
My favorite fictional characters (some bookish, some not)

What's in a Name?
On books inspiring how I name my children

A Conversation
A weird conversation with a UPS delivery driver about Clarissa

Good Things

There are a lot of good things going on in my life right now.  On of the nicest is that I ditched my facebook account.  I'm tired of all the political yammering and people making drama out of nothing.  Also, since getting my Android I realized that I spend way too much time on facebook.  Whenever I am bored or tired or just sitting around I find myself numbly scrolling through my facebook updates.  What a waste of time.  I am less glued to my phone now and I find that I spend more time reading or actually doing things rather than just "liking" random goofy pictures.

Other good things:

Taking Hope shopping for back to school garb.  7th grade starts this week!

Actually making some of my pins

Sam and I rescued an injured fledgling turkey vulture and took him to an animal rehab place. 

I've consumed a load of fish sandwiches as they are my most persistent pregnancy craving.

My friend Catherine made me (and Sam, but I've claimed it) a beautiful quilt.  I love it.

I spent Friday helping with a charity bake sale for a friend injured in a car wreck.  We raised $558 in 3.5 hours!

Reading under my quilt with my first decaf coffee that has made me hurl. I haven't had coffee in about 5 weeks.  It is nice to be feeling better.

Last night I made peach cobbler with farmer's market peaches.  Yum!

I've spent a lot of time with this little man.  He is my sweetheart.

Good stuff happening all round.  I hope you all are enjoying the simple pleasures and avoiding the haters!

Uncle Silas by J. Sheridan Le Fanu

I love Victorian novels, but I love creepy Victorian novels the most and Uncle Silas certainly falls within the category of creepy.  It is very difficult for me to write non-spoiler book posts when mysterious are the subject, so consider this your warning:  there are spoilers out the wazoo ahead.

Maud Ruthyn is a very naive and very wealthy young woman who lives with her eccentric, kind, and bordering reclusive father.  Her father is a follower of Emanuel Swedenborg (an odd Christian oculist and scientist) and has a reserved, yet odd affectation.  Maud learns early on about her shamed Uncle Silas; in his youth Uncle Silas was a gambler, made an unfortunate marriage, and has been disgraced by a suicide committed by one of his house guests years earlier.  When her father dies, Maud learns -- much to the horror of other family members -- that she is to live with her Uncle Silas until she comes of age and if she dies before the age of 21, Uncle Silas inherits her fortune.  The book is chock full of  mystery, greed, murder, an evil governess, dark rooms, laudanum, lies, and hints at the paranormal.  Oh, and someone dies by being beaten with blunt object.  I COULD NOT PUT THIS BOOK DOWN.  It certainly remind me of the perfect mix of The Woman in White by Wilkie Collins meets The Mysteries of Udolpho by Ann Radcliffe. 

Sorry this review is so short -- I really want to be reading right now and not hammering away at the keyboard. Ha!

This book is #3 on my Classics Club list.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
#2 -- The Collected Stories of Elizabeth Bowen
#1-- The Tenant of Wildfell Hall by Anne Bronte

Oh My... How Pinteresting: 08/02/2012

I have decided to sign up for the Pin it and Do it Challenge this month.  I decided to to this when I made a pinboard of completed pins and realized I've only done two pins... one in October of 2011 and one this past July.  Sheesh!  Hopefully this will compel me to actually do something.  I signing up for the second level, Pinterested which is to complete 4-7 pins in the month of August.  I've shared some of the things I want to to here and here, but here are a few more things catching my eye:

Veggies make me puke right now, but I think I could eat this!

Homemade baby wipes

Washcloth patterns... this is quick way to use up yarn!

I'm thinking this would be great in my room or in the living room

Atticus's burp cloths were used to death.  I need to make a bunch before baby #3 arrives

Whelp.  I think I have enough on my plate for now.  Time to actually get my butt in gear and make stuff.

Join in with the fun!

Readerly Rambles: July Reads and August's Book Pile

July was an okay reading month for me; my ultimate goal is to read at least 5-7 books a month and I read 5 in July so I guess I'm okay.  I'm hopeful that August will a bit more readerly.

What I read:
The Collected Stories of Elizabeth Bowen
Interlibrary Loan Practices Handbook edited by Cherie L. Weible and Karen L. Janke (for work... bleh)
The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath  (I think this is reading number 11)
Giving Up by Jillian Becker (an okay interesting book length essay by a friend of Sylvia Plath)
Uncle Silas by Sheridan LeFanu (expect a review on Sunday!)


Exciting Times:
Yay!  Onto a new reading adventure.  I've ditched most of my reading challenges and promised myself to not sign up for any new reading events until September (although I was sorely tempted by Austen in August). For August I have some books from my stacks (2), a few ILL items (2), and a pile from the public library (5).

August Reading Pile:

• Famous Ghost Stories edited by Bennett Cerf
• Oddfellow's Orphanage by Emily Winfield Martin
• Ghost Hunters: William James and the Search for Scientific Proof of Life After Death by Deborah Blum
• The Marriage Plot by Jefferey Eugenides
• Birdsong by Sebastian Faulks
• Mythology by Edith Hamilton
• Beyond the Sling: A Real-Life Guide to Raising Confident, Loving Children the Attachment Parenting Way by Mayim Bialik
• Less Than Angels by Barbara Pym
• The Children by Edith Wharton

Currently Working On:
I'm working my way through Famous Ghost Stories here and there.  The collection isn't too big -- 16 stories -- and I think it will make a nice before bed read.  Well, if I don't get too spooked.  I started Oddfellow's Orphanage and it is a pretty adorable book.